The scene about to come on was the scourging of Our Lord. He had already been handed over to Pontius Pilate and was sent to be punished through flogging. Seeing this movie before, I knew what was coming, but much like the Passion narrative of the Bible, there is always something knew to be felt and experienced according to revelation of the Holy Spirit. So, I opened my heart and allowed Jesus to meet me during the moments of my witnessing, once again, this re-presentation of His brutal scourging.
The first thing that entered my mind was the fact that Christ endured this torture and death because of His intimate love for us. This wasn't simply some duty He had to fulfill. Theology of the Body has shown me that Jesus is my Bridegroom who has the same longing, passion, and love for me that my bridegroom on earth does. Jesus was motivated by pure, desirous love and a yearning for the gates of Heaven to be opened that I might spend eternity with Him in perfect union and ecstasy.
As Jesus was being strapped down and stripped, I heard His voice in my own heart tell me that the love He has for me was His motivation and strength. That His love for me got Him through the pain. I looked intently at the torture instruments - the reeds, the cat o' nine tails meant to inflict nothing short of death - and I could plainly see the damage to Christ's body being done. There came a point where Christ's strength seemed to leave Him and He fell, draped over the stump He was chained to. The soldiers, knowing that they weren't to kill him there, stopped their torture and retreated back. But then something happened. Christ got up. Now, if Jesus had just laid there, the scourging would've been done. The pain of this stage would be over. In getting up Jesus wasn't trying to prove a point that He was stronger than the soldiers believed Him to be, but rather that He was willing to to endure anything for His bride. He wasn't satisfied with "just enough to get by." Jesus wanted to give it all - every last ounce of His strength, His life to prove His overwhelming love for us.
I was then drawn back to myself and the fact that my love no where near measures up to Christ's. How many times do I take the easy way out or get by with proving my love "just enough"? How many times do I think about myself and what I get out of my relationships - especially my relationship with my husband? And if I were in Christ's position, would I stay on the ground in surrender or would I get up, too, to show those I love that I have more to give?
Jesus, thank you. Thank you for your unconditional and fervent love for me. You endured so much to prove that you would do anything to be with me. And you have asked, in return, that my love look like Your Love. How many times do I fail! I am not worthy to be called Your beloved, and yet You would do it all again, just to be with me. Teach me the ways of Your Love. Teach me how to endure through pain and suffering to show my love. May the ones You have given me - my spouse , my children, my family, my friends - see Your Love in me. And let me never tire in the ways of love, so that I may one day be united to You in eternal bliss.
No greater love has one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends."
John 15:13
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